Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Ok! We all know moving is never a pleasant situation. There is stress involved and I learned early on during our first move you've got to give and take a little. This has been ...hands down...the hardest move we've ever handled. I believe it is most likely because the situation of dealing with the recession and everything which has made it more difficult. In these hard situations our families have surrounded us and been supportive. Our friends have been supportive as well and we could never make it this far without our family and friends.
Today my dear hubby presented the straw that broke the camel's back. Last night, while talking I explained to him I had several items on my list to complete before I could leave and these items were so large in my eyes that until I arrived in San Antonio I was not going to take on anything else. He understood completely after explaining all of my thoughts.
This morning however I nearly lost it. He called while I dropped the kids off at school and told me he was having problems with his phone. In my defense I kept my cool and didn't fly off the handle. I asked him very simply what he would like me to do and he told me he wanted me to fix it...4 states over. I told him I would call tech support to get their advice. However, I already knew what they were going to say....bring it to a store and have them test it...and they said it. I called him back and told him the verdict. He seemed very sad that I couldn't snap my fingers and make everything all better.
Then I realized. I love to serve my husband. I love to serve my family. I am a control freak to a point. I do have my anxieties about such things as flying, but every time I step foot on an airplane I have to make the conscious decision to let go. Why is that? I always try to pictures all the many amazing adventures and experiences I would have to give up if I didn't let go of that control.
Back to the point at hand...I serve my husband to the point where I've taken care of everything and he hasn't had the experience of building that independent spirit. The last thing I wanted him to do is not be able to make up his mind on how to do these simple things. What I have done all of these years?! I felt bad, but I have a renewed determination that when we are back together we are going to change it up a little bit. Slowly and surely I will help him to gain that self confidence and independence he needs and deserves. With us both working down south we will need to work as a team in different capacities, but we will work together.
Through this experience I am amazed at the growth my children have gained. We talk and make daily decisions. They feel as if they have a voice in all of this. They cook more and complain less. They are good now telling me things they need from the store ahead of time. I am grateful for this experience to open my eyes to our continual improvement and how far we've come!!!